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Introducing you to the Queen of Modern Etiquette. Myka Meier has accomplished the seemingly impossible task of learning to be socially-savvy less daunting and more relatable. According to her website, "Her modern outlook on etiquette revolves around the motto that it’s just a way of conducting yourself in order to show respect, consideration, and kindness to those around you." As the founder of Beaumont Etiquette and The Plaza Hotel Finishing Program, a two-time best selling author, and an experienced brand storyteller, Myka Meier has perfected the art of teaching others the skills needed to succeed in any social or business setting. 'Tis the season for holiday festivities, and the Susan Shaw Team chatted with Myka to discuss all things modern etiquette to ensure a successful, socially-savvy season of celebrating.
MM: I did not grow up in a formal environment or with a formal background in etiquette, and in fact I only took my first etiquette course as an adult. I think my interest in learning etiquette came really because of an insecurity of not truly knowing the correct way to eat with my silverware or how to introduce someone properly in business. When I went to etiquette school while working abroad in London, I was astonished at what I learned, and eventually enrolled into Swiss Finishing School and then trained under a former member of Her Majesty the Queen’s household staff. I have started hosting cocktail parties where I would teach my peers what I learned (just for fun) and soon it became a hot ticket in town, and I had 50-60 people showing up every week and I knew I was onto something. I started my company Beaumont Etiquette and then moved back to NYC in 2013 where I opened an office and started teaching etiquette there. I founded The Plaza Hotel Finishing Program in 2016 and wrote two books Modern Etiquette Made Easy and Business Etiquette Made Easy. Today I teach across the US and world instructing corporate and private groups, traveling as a keynote speaker, and running my NYC based etiquette company with my amazing team.
MM:
Working at The Plaza is pretty magical and over the years the team and staff have become wonderful friends and colleagues. Whether it be teaching an afternoon tea course or an empowering business networking client, working under the chandeliers never gets old!
MM:
I love contrast and a bit of style drama! I would describe my go-to uniform as a popped collared Oxford button down, tucked in with a stretchy cotton trouser, a ballet flat and then a fabulous pair of bold Susan Shaw earrings and a matching bracelet. Susan Shaw first caught my eye because of the bright gold pieces which pops with anything you wear.
MM: I love contrast and a bit of style drama! I would describe my go-to uniform as a popped collared Oxford button down, tucked in with a stretchy cotton trouser, a ballet flat and then a fabulous pair of bold Susan Shaw earrings and a matching bracelet. Susan Shaw first caught my eye because of the bright gold pieces which pops with anything you wear.
MM:
My greatest host trick is to hit all the senses of guests when they walk in. So, for example, when guests arrive to my home, I have something cooking that fills the air with an amazing scent (and if it’s a tea party, I will bake scones or if it’s a fall cocktail party for example, I will just put on some apple cider on the stove to simmer for the smell, but you can also just light candles). I will always have music to set the tone (no TVs on as they are distracting), lighting and decor to make it festive, food and drinks already made and ready to offer etc.
The greatest host tip however is to make people feel instantly computable and happy when they enter your home- take their coats, tell them how happy you are they are here or how lovely they look and introduce them to everyone there.
MM: I always offer to help wherever I can- from the moment I accept the invitation I ask what I can bring, and during the party I try to see where I can help and always offer to assist in any way. Of course, you never want to arrive empty handed- and bringing a thoughtful host gift shows gratitude for being invited and hosted. Lastly a thank you letter goes a very long way.
MM: I have a formula in my social etiquette book that teaches the perfect way to write a thank you note, however I recommend starting a thank you note with something emotive such as “Dear XX, I’m still dreaming of the homemade pumpkin pie you served at your incredible dinner party....” I still think handwritten is the most impactful, and I never start a thank you letter with the words “Thank you for...”
MM: I think what is important is to pick something you think the host will enjoy. For example, if you know they have a sweet tooth, your batch of homemade double fudge brownies might be perfect treat, or if they host cocktail parties, getting them monogrammed linen cocktail napkins would be a beautiful gift. If the host has a pet, add on a chew with a bow or something for their furry friend too!
The secret is just to bring something that will bring joy- it’s as simple as that! One great fall host gift idea for the style lover is a pair of Susan Shaw earrings with one of my “Mind Your Manners” sweaters from my website ;)
MM: My main rule is to throw kindness like confetti! Etiquette is all about showing respect, kindness and consideration to everyone and all living things around us and thinking of others first. Truly, the most important thing to remember is to do what shows respect to others in every situation. Some etiquette rules are outdated and not relevant anymore, but that one will always stand true.
MM: Teaching underprivileged students as a volunteer in Indonesia, launching my new website and all my new online courses on MykaMeier.com, watching my son take his first steps.
MM:
I have a jewelry roll that I take everywhere with me, and I keep at least 3 pair of earrings with me- a pair of studs, and two statement pair. A jewelry roll is a game changer- it keeps you organized, protects your jewelry and you can just throw it in your bag. I have a YouTube video on what is in my handbag, and you can see the roll up close.
MM:
I advise people to match what they wear with the formality of the event. Be sure the colors and materials you wear are appropriate for the dress code, venue, season, and environment you are in. Colors are important too- white and off-white are traditionally reserved for the bridal couple and be cautious of wearing a black dress during a summer day wedding or similar.
MM:
The key word here to me is black-tie- which means floor-length-gowns! Therefore, I would probably wear a long, beautiful long velvet dress I have in navy blue and pair it with a pair of drop earrings such as the Dogwood Cotton Pearl Drop earrings matched with Baroque Pearl Bracelet. Pearls are always a good idea!
MM: Book early- reservations, especially in peak season go months in advance! Ask the servers for tea suggestions- the tea menu is incredible, and the servers are very knowledgeable. Try something new- it’s easy to order something you already know and love, but the selection of special and rare teas is so dreamy!
Come hungry- people often think it’s just a sandwich and a scone, but it’s so much more than that and is a three tier, three course meal! Practice good tea etiquette such as holding the teacup correctly and eating your scones in the right way! I have an entire tea etiquette master course available to make sure that you are prepared for your visit.
MM:
I have had my eye on the Double Link Chain bracelet for a couple months now. It will go perfectly with my Queen Elizabeth Coin Necklace!